The Bittersweet of Back to School
Tomorrow is the first day of school...I don't know if moms are still doing this, but for as long as I can remember there has been a back to school coffee gathering where collective sighs of relief, or snotty noses being blown can be heard. The sighs of relief seem to outnumber the snotty noses ten to one. Summer vacation is long. Personally, I would rather have year round school and three week breaks every three months or so. But no one asked me. I also have to admit that there were times in the past when I was more than ready for school to start so I could get on with whatever it was that I thought was more important than spending time with my girsl, and my sighs could be heard loud and clear, too.
But not this year. It's snotty nose time for me. My daughter, Tianna, who it seems just yesterday was in preschool pressing her hand prints on construction paper to make special cards for me, is now going to middle school. Middle school...She is growing up into a young lady who will want to spend more and more time with friends and less and less time with me.
And Nicole, who is going into fourth grade, but still enjoys a long cuddle at bedtime, and I am not in such a hurry to get to bed myself because those days are numbered also. She came into my room this morning and I had coffee in bed while we watched some TV together. She wanted to know how to make and upload a video that she had heard about on the Disney channel, and instead of "later, later" we looked it up on the spot, plugged in the video camera to charge the battery and she happily went off to pick her wardrobe and rehearse her son. I imagine I will be the camera man, except maybe not. Matt's girlfriend Carolyn was a film major at Ithaca and if she is here (and I think she will be Wed/Thur.) can shoot it and put it together for her.
So I am sad. Sad the summer is over. It is full of good memories:
But not this year. It's snotty nose time for me. My daughter, Tianna, who it seems just yesterday was in preschool pressing her hand prints on construction paper to make special cards for me, is now going to middle school. Middle school...She is growing up into a young lady who will want to spend more and more time with friends and less and less time with me.
And Nicole, who is going into fourth grade, but still enjoys a long cuddle at bedtime, and I am not in such a hurry to get to bed myself because those days are numbered also. She came into my room this morning and I had coffee in bed while we watched some TV together. She wanted to know how to make and upload a video that she had heard about on the Disney channel, and instead of "later, later" we looked it up on the spot, plugged in the video camera to charge the battery and she happily went off to pick her wardrobe and rehearse her son. I imagine I will be the camera man, except maybe not. Matt's girlfriend Carolyn was a film major at Ithaca and if she is here (and I think she will be Wed/Thur.) can shoot it and put it together for her.
So I am sad. Sad the summer is over. It is full of good memories:
- Hiking at Zion National Park, which some of us liked better than others...
- A triathlon in South Carolina.
- Two wonderful weeks at the lake in Virginia with lots of water tubing and even some water skiing.
- Time with Matt and Carolyn.
- Tianna playing on the All Star Softball team.
- Having my mom with us.
- Playing with the kittens.
- Long evening talks with my friend Katy who came to Va. We saw lots of shooting stars!
- My visit with my elementary school friend in CA.
- And so much more...
But now it's back to school, and while routine is nice, I will miss the time we have together. I guess I need to go blow my nose
Peace.
Labels: Back to School, bittersweet, family vacation, summer memories
posted by www.kathypride.com at
10:41 PM
5 Comments:
I think about those back-to-school commercials, with the parents riding gaily on the shopping carts and the music in the background playing, "It's the most wonderful time of the year...", and I think, "How sad."
My daughter is almost 24 and my son is almost 8, and I have only had that "empty house" experience for one year, when my daughter was in 9th grade and wanted to go to a "real" school and we decided she was mature enough to go to a place full of peer pressure and teenage drama, and still retain her values and her personality and identity. So for one year, I had a lonely house during the daytime...We have always homeschooled.
What I think is sad is that sense of relief that the children are gone. Am I the only person in the world that thinks this is WRONG? Our culture portrays it like children are a burden--and what a relief when they leave the house!! Aside from appreciating the reprieve at naptime when my kids were toddlers, I have never felt this way about my kids. When my daughter's peers went away to kindergarten, the thought of sending her away for hours every day was unbearable. And now that she is grown and we have our son, and time is going ever so much faster than it used to, there was never any question but that we would homeschool him. (which, by the way, allows us to take vacations whenever we need to--we are not dictated by someone else's schedule.)
The Bible teaches that children are a blessing, and we need to believe that and walk it out, and rebuke the world's subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) profession to the contrary.
(okay, stepping down off my soapbox now!!)
Hi Kara,
You can get on any soapbox you like anytime. I have several that I perch upon frequently.
I admire you for homeschooling. I have several homeschooling friends, but I know I should never say never, but I just don't think it would ever work for us. I guess maybe I am still too selfish...but I am cherishing the rest of time and realigning my life to hang out more with my girls and older boys and fit the stuff in where it fits.
Knowing that you have a 24 year old daughter, and homeschooled, you have probably come across the opinions and resources of my sister in law. Yes, that would be Mary Pride. My husband's brother's wife (obviously).
Also, don't know if you have read my testimony, but I have only known and been crazy for Jesus for seven years...better late than never though!
As for the world's messages that children aren't a blessing, there are more and more not so subtle reminders of that and it is distressing.
I know I am blessed.
Thanks for reading and writing!
Kathy
Ah, yes, Very familiar with Mary Pride...at least was 20 years ago!! Not so much now. (Goodness, I'm getting old, when I can remmeber 20 years ago like it was yesterday--and 30...and even 40--but that's not quite like yesterday....it's a little foggy).
I have never regretted homeschooling Nor have I regretted sending my daughter to private school when she wanted to go. She learned some hard life/social lessons there that I could not have taught her. And I think it made her appreciate our home more, and the gentleness and respect that we show each other MOST of the time.
She married a homeschooled boy as well, interestingly. She didn't meet him until almost a year before she married him--but he's a keeper and I'm glad she didn't let him get away. (nor he her!)
Our son is a challenge, and I think he would not do well in an enviroment full of distraction. I'm also thankful that I have a lot of years of experience under my belt before educating him, because he is a child God could only give to an experienced parent!!
I have friends from every inch of the spectrum: homeschooling to private schooling to public schooling to unschooling....It's a hard decision for anyone to make. I wish people would not make it based on whether they think they can but more on the needs of the children--I hear "I couldn't do that" a lot. I was there once, but dreaded the alternative.
Definitley easiest to start with first grade and work your way up than to start in middle school....eeegad.
Definitely better late than never. I haven't read your testimony yet, but will. I find it curious that people can live in this culture where 'seemingly' the gospel is so prevalent and not have ever heard it. But God alone knows the soil of our hearts. We can only cast the seed, and THAT not frugally!!
It occurred to me...when I said "I have friends from every inch of the homeschool spectrum..." that was sort of like saying, "Some of my best friends are black." (or Jewish or whatever minority you want to stick in there)... I hope it didn't come across that way. I truly do understand that we are all at different stages in our development and we all have different gifts and talents and different weaknesses, and what is so right for me can be totally wrong for someone else....So I'm not saying that it's absolutely right for everyone....It's just so good for US, and I would hate for anyone to opt out because they don't feel adequate. God makes us more than adequate for whatever He calls us to.
I look around at some of the people in my life who would be so much more qualified to raise my son than I am, with his special learning styles and his uniqueness. But God gave him to ME to raise, and therefore God will make me adequate, or more than adequate, to do the job; and in the process of making me adequate, I am growing...
God will always provide us with what we need to do the job He asks of us. But, in my experience at least, that does not mean it is easy.
My grandma used to say, "God, please give me patience. And give it to me RIGHT NOW!!" I have learned that patience is a wall, like they built around Jerusalem, brick by difficult brick. Patience is built by trial after trial after trial. And if you ask for patience, what you will really get will be aggravating situation after aggravating situation, to build your patience.
A fried of mine said faith was the same way--built brick by brick, day by day, wilderness experience by wilderness experience. loss by loss, provision by provision.
Oh what we bring on by asking for patience and faith!! :)
Loved and agreed with your thoughts and you have inspired me to put the truth in the truth and transparency of the posts. The transparency part I think I've got, now the truth. I love tying Scripture to everyday life. It gets us through and keeps us encouraged.
I have to admit there is a hint of inadequacy that creeps into my being when I talk to homeschoolers. I know it is a special gift, and if I didn't run away from it, God would certainly equip me in that area. My sense is that He has gifted me in other areas and that is where my passion flows...I don't know. But I have tremendous respect for people who make that commitment. But I do carry some guilt about not having made that choice at times accentuated by those who believe every child should be homeschooled...
On another note, I do still regularly pray for patience; I just know to say, OK Lord, bring it on and equip me...
Peace.
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