Matt, I Love You!

The following is from today's Purpose Driven Life Devotional, written by Jon Walker:

"The apostle Paul says this is the problem with the law: We keep excluding people based on jot-and-tittle questions, such as what they eat or drink, how they celebrate a holiday, or if they wear a tie on Sunday (Colossians 2:16).

God comes in grace, saying, “The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love” (Galatians 5:6 NIV)."

Yes, we need to honor God, but I so believe that honoring comes through extending love and grace, the unconditional love of the father of the Prodigal Son variety (See John 15:11).

How do we do this? (Especially if it is one of your kids driving you nuts!)

OK, If I pay attention to the Apostle Paul, I guess I need to stop fretting about appearances, and stop nagging Nicole about her hair...and relate to her and love her as she is, where she is. (That doesn't mean tolerating disrespect, or letting her get away with things, one of the irrefutable laws of life is that we reap what we sow (in other words, suffer the consequences, or joys, of our decisions).

But there is a joy and freedom that comes along with celebrating and loving people where they are. I haven't always been good at this...like when we were at the bottom of the valley with Matt. But that is in the past, and we made it through. (If you don't know about this journey, it was what brought me to my knees and can be found elsewhere on my website, under testimony).

It is what made Saturday in Ithaca especially sweet. The joy of being in the moment. The joy of simply being. The joy of hanging out. The joy of experiencing where we are now compared to where we once were. Is there someone you need to be somewhere different with? Why not now? Take the first step...

I started to cry on the drive home. I remembered the same drive about eight years ago. I was listening to Michael W. Smith on a CD singing Kentucky Rose. Chris was a student at Ithaca College at the time and I had been up for a visit with him. Matt was struggling and Chris was too, in his own way. I remembered the past drive and the rawness of the pain as if it were yesterday. Driving home in confusion about how we had arrived at such a desperate place, and just sobbing. I hadn't let go or come to faith, or the beginning, very beginning steps of grace yet. I am coming to understand that faith is so much about grace. And I know I still have far to go, but what I realized even then was that somehow something had gone very wrong and that unconditional love wasn't there. Hurt, lies, deceit and brokenness were there. And it felt awful.

But this time the tears were tears of joy. Joy that love is present. That Matt is happy. That we got to laugh at a St. Bernard named Oscar. That I didn't even comment on the messiness of his room. (I didn't go to see his room or run a white gloved finger over any surfaces); I went to visit Matt and Carolyn and enjoy a day without any agenda other than being present and extending love. And that is grace.

Matt, I love you!