Divide and Conquer
Today was a "divide and conquer" day. In other words, how to manage being in two places at the same time.
I went to church and stayed for the budget approval meeting, and Howie took the girls to their swim meet. We are in a new league this year and some of the meets are on Sunday afternoons. I don't like it much, and don't think Howie did either, especially with it being playoff time in the NFL. Oh well, his team is out of it anyway...
After the meeting I went to the mall where I had to go back to Hollister to get the stinking security tag removed off a pair of pants Tianna bought. When I was told they could take care of me at the checkout and there were eight people on line, I resorted to begging one of the clothing folders to just help me out. It was bad enough to have to go back to have the stinking tag removed, but to wait on another long line was pushing me over the edge.
While at the mall I also went to the ATT store to investigate cell phone exchange options. It is for the cell phone we got Tianna for Christmas that we swore we wouldn't get.I got it on an upgrade with ATT, but bought it at WalMart. Without going through all the gyrations of all the ramifications of returning a phone one place and re buying at another, let's just suffice it to say I was regretting ever yielding in the first place. It just isn't as easy as you think it should be. No saved contacts, no same number, no immediate turn around...but, something was perfect about my timing.
I ran into very old friends while I was there, swimming parents from our first go round as swim coaches twenty years ago. Well, the guy has gone from former bar owner to pastor, and they invited me to speak at their Valentine sweetheart dinner. They want real, honest to goodness funny true life. I am going to do something incorporating communication and expectations and dress in my pink Jammie's with my tiara. I can hardly wait.
So, I want to do something like, "Ten things you and your spouse approach differently." Flannel vs. silkies is for sure one, asking for directions another...what are some other good ones? I can't wait, it should be great.
I am exhausted. Sleep well.
I went to church and stayed for the budget approval meeting, and Howie took the girls to their swim meet. We are in a new league this year and some of the meets are on Sunday afternoons. I don't like it much, and don't think Howie did either, especially with it being playoff time in the NFL. Oh well, his team is out of it anyway...
After the meeting I went to the mall where I had to go back to Hollister to get the stinking security tag removed off a pair of pants Tianna bought. When I was told they could take care of me at the checkout and there were eight people on line, I resorted to begging one of the clothing folders to just help me out. It was bad enough to have to go back to have the stinking tag removed, but to wait on another long line was pushing me over the edge.
While at the mall I also went to the ATT store to investigate cell phone exchange options. It is for the cell phone we got Tianna for Christmas that we swore we wouldn't get.I got it on an upgrade with ATT, but bought it at WalMart. Without going through all the gyrations of all the ramifications of returning a phone one place and re buying at another, let's just suffice it to say I was regretting ever yielding in the first place. It just isn't as easy as you think it should be. No saved contacts, no same number, no immediate turn around...but, something was perfect about my timing.
I ran into very old friends while I was there, swimming parents from our first go round as swim coaches twenty years ago. Well, the guy has gone from former bar owner to pastor, and they invited me to speak at their Valentine sweetheart dinner. They want real, honest to goodness funny true life. I am going to do something incorporating communication and expectations and dress in my pink Jammie's with my tiara. I can hardly wait.
So, I want to do something like, "Ten things you and your spouse approach differently." Flannel vs. silkies is for sure one, asking for directions another...what are some other good ones? I can't wait, it should be great.
I am exhausted. Sleep well.
Labels: cell phones, DIvid and Conquer, speaking at sweetheart banquet
posted by www.kathypride.com at
10:42 PM
3 Comments:
differences? Ugh, timing. He is always early, I am always late. You get the picture. Yesterday, K had a basketball game in Brownsville, about half hour away. He said we should leave at 2. I had a longer-than-expected walk withy my friend in Eugene and had taken the gas guzzler 300,000 Big Red pickup (see my proflie photo) to get a load of hog fuel for the mucky horse pasture/sleep area, and didn't get out until 2:15. They were waiting for me to call to know I was alive before they would even leave, so we ended up goingin separate vehicles, but I made it on time, barely.
But that is always a sticking point with us. My daughter is programmed like me and her dh is like my dh...Nuff said!!
And then there is ketchup. He likes on most everything, including things that turn your stomach, like ketchup and corn dogs or ketchup and Ham...blech!! And mayo...he eats mayo on just about everything. he hates pickles and anything vieegary or sour, I live on it. In my family, the one who eats the last dill pickle gets first dibs on drinking the brine and eating the garlic at the bottom. His family never even touched a pickle!!--or sauerkraut, which I love on just about everything, like baked potatoes or pork (pork has to have SOMETHING with it to make it palatable, like cranberry sause, applesauce or sauerkraut. I'm sure you have your OWN stories on that account.
How about drying feet? We have 8 cats and if we leave a rug or towel on the bathroom floor (conveniently in front of the litter box, as luck would have it), they get a little lazy and use the towel. Me, when I get out of the bath/shower, I dry most of the way off, then dangle the end of the towel on the floor and step on it to dry my feet. Dh throws a towel on the floor, steps on it, and then never picks it up....EWWWW. (I know, evict the cats, right?)
I'll keep thinking...I'm sure there's more...like how he took over cooking when I was pregnant with our son, and I never took the privilege back--and how different our standards of care are? eeeeek. I try not to look, or I would never eat again. And once in a while I sneak in and wash the stove, and the sink, and the fridge, and the pots, and the glasses, and....to MY standards...like before I cook anything!!
Congratulations on all your successes, Kathy!
Now, as to differences between hubbies and wives, I don't know if the differences between me and Jeff have anything to do with being different sexes or just different people. Inotherwords, I am not prepared to generalize that I am like most wives or he is like most husbands.
That being said, however....
Emotional vocabulary. Mine is much larger and his frustratingly small (basically, happy, angry, bored, impatient). Frustrated comes off as anger and so does sad.
Outlook: his is pessimistic (he's like a man walking under a thunder cloud) and mine optimistic.
Sense of priorities: Mine are family, self-care, pets and home. His are work, work and football.
Vacations: his idea of vacationing is to pack everything possible into one -- see every sight within 500 miles. It rarely will included something JUST for the kids -- if he's not interested, we don't do it. My idea of vacationing included more down time and going slower through each day (one museum, not all). And seeing the kids enjoy something makes me happy, even if it's something I don't personally enjoy (like amusement parks).
Child-rearing: He is definitely more strict and unforgiving and quicker to lose his patience with the kids than I. He sees me as too lax and permissive. I see myself as a more loving, understanding, accepting, helping parent. I try really hard not to lose my temper because it never accomplishes anything. I think my children know I love them unconditionally.
So, are these husband and wife differences? Or differences between any two people?
Oh, and both of us prefer me in silky night wear.
I forgot an important difference between us: health. It is my number one priority, for without it, I can do nothing else -- I can't take care of my family, certainly. I strive each day to make the best choices to get healthy and stay healthy that I can make. Jeff, on the other hand, is shockingly inattentive to his health. I have even tried asking him if being around for his children and grandchildren wouldn't inspire him. Well, at least for Christmas, he gave me the best gift possible -- appointment cards for blood work and a physical with his doctor. I almost cried I was so relieved he finally heard me. Now as to whether he'll actually do what the doctor suggests, we'll just have to wait and see....
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