Church, Healing and Forgiveness

I had an interesting conversation with a friend yesterday, and it ties in with one of the comments on a previous post about the church's role in meeting people's needs and the fact that it was never supposed to be the government's job to do that. (Did I get that right? Please correct me if not).

But the church isn't always so good at doing that. That was part of the conversation with my friend yesterday. There are churches that do that, and do it well. I think the church I worship at does it well, and is on a journey to do it better. But it took me till I was 41 to find that kind of church. The church, and representation I had found of Christ prior to that time was harsh, judgemental and full of shame, blame and condemnation. Not a place to find healing if I was hurting and desperate. I only gave church, and as such, representatives of Christ (the Christians I had met before were not representing anyone I would want to know, let alone commit my life to) one more chance because I was desperate and I had a loving, caring friend who gently invited me to come to church with her when I was ready. No strings attached. But without the personal invitation from someone I loved, respected and trusted I never would have gone or expected to find in it a safe haven of love and acceptance.

Is church as a safe haven of love and acceptance the norm? Or is it an exception. The perception is certainly that it is an exception. Just read UnChristian and you will find an account of how most people not engaged with a local church view church. It isn't pretty. If you are a Christian and as such a representative of Christ, it is worth reading to give you insight into what others, those people termed "lost" or "unsaved" (and I have to admit that I cringe at those terms) perceive. And then see if you fit their perceptions (I hope not) or not. And reflect and pray about how you can better reflect the spirit of Jesus.

Which brings me to another thought tied into a previous comment, the one about Christians having two faces, one for Sunday and one for the rest of the week, and the reminder that there shouldn't be any difference because as Christians our lives should put a smile on God's face, even if it ticks off your neighbor...But how many transparent people do you really know? And how many are double-faced?

Which begs another question. When someone asks you how you are and it isn't anywhere near fine, do you answer "fine" or do you give the real answer, which no doubt is not what the other person was expecting. It takes time to listen and empathize. To me, that is one of the marks of a Samaritan. Someone who takes time to stop, listen and care. How many Samaritans do you know? How many people serve knee deep? Does the church promote a Samaritan lifestyle, or has church become consumerist too?


So anyway,I read the following quote on Pete Wilson's blog, which is what got me going on this stream of consciousness. He is a pastor of a church in Nashville called CrossPoint. I know I would really like it there.
The following was written by Henry Nouwen.

“When we have been wounded by the Church, our temptation is to reject it. But when we reject the Church it becomes very hard for us to keep in touch with the living Christ. When we say, “I love Jesus, but I hate the Church,” we end up losing not only the Church but Jesus too.
The challenge is to forgive the Church.
This challenge is especially great because the Church seldom asks us for forgiveness, at least not officially. But the Church as an often fallible human organization needs our forgiveness, while the Church as the living Christ among us continues to offer us forgiveness.
It is important to think about the Church not as “over there” but as a community of struggling, weak people of whom we are part and in whom we meet our Lord and Redeemer.”
- Henry Nouwen

This speaks to me today. We are a community of struggling, weak people. And we need to extend grace to each other. I need to extend grace to those with whom I don't agree, and I pray that they extend grace to me as well. If we did extend grace, we may be a step closer in meeting some of the needs of hurting people. After all, Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick" (Matthew 9:12).

And not enough healing has been going on.

Contemplating Grace

I'd like to park here on the subject of grace for a bit. We have been reading Philip Yancey's What's So Amazing About Grace in Sunday School, and I just can't get enough, enough of the book and thoughts it invites, enough of the concept and grasping it and enough of it in my life.

But it is a tightrope walk and a balancing act, teetering on that fine line of grace. As a parent I want to love, support, encourage and extend a hand of hope and healing. The trick is, I want to stop short of enabling.

I want love and forgiveness to be part of my vocabulary. I want to speak the truth in love. I don't want bitterness to work its way in contaminating my words and relationships. As such, I see grace as a shade of gray. Perhaps a shade of gra(y)ce.